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  2. WARNING.....

    Alcohol WarningsDue to increasing products liability, alcoholic beverages manufacturers have accepted the Medical Association's suggestion that the following Warning labels be placed immediately on all bottles.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.Warning: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a wanker.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your face in.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that people are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your clothes.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you possess mystical Kung-Fu powers.Warning: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead to traffic signs and cones appearing in your home.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that people are laughing with you.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.Warning: Consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy.
  3. Website Briefly Offline

    Hi guys, The website was offline for most of the day yesterday dues to our host changing some file paths however, all has now been resolved thankfully. Can you all please LIKE us on our Facebook Page Here which will continue to use more often especially if this site os offline for any reason. Cheers Jamer
  4. Happy new years!

    Belated new year shout to you all too...
  5. 50 shades

    The missus bought a Paperback, down Shepton Mallet way, I had a look inside her bag; T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey". Well I just left her to it, And at ten I went to bed? An hour later she appeared; The sight filled me with dread... In her left she held a rope; And in her right a whip! She threw them down upon the floor, And then began to strip. Well fifty years or so ago; I might have had a peek; But Ethel hasn't weathered well; She's eighty four next week!! Watching Ethel bump and grind; Could not have been much grimmer. And things then went from bad to worse; She toppled off her Zimmer! She struggled back upon her feet; A couple minutes later; She put her teeth back in and said I am a dominator!! Now if you knew our Ethel, You'd see just why I spluttered, I'd spent two months in traction For the last complaint I'd uttered. She stood there nude and naked Bent forward just a bit I went to hold her, sensual like and stood on her left tit! Ethel screamed, her teeth shot out; My God what had I done !? She moaned and groaned then shouted out: "Step on the other one!! Well readers, I can tell no more; Of what occurred that day. Suffice to say my jet black hair, Turned fifty shades of grey................
  6. Happy new years!

    Happy new year to you all, lets hope this one is a good one
  7. Happy new years!

    Happy new year people
  8. Happy new years!

    Happy new year folks :)
  9. Happy new years!

    Happy New Year to everyone here in the Pad.
  10. Happy new years!

    Happy New Year to all at JamersPad
  11. Happy new years!

    Happy New Year to all Padsters (Yes, even you All1)
  12. Happy new years!

  13. Royal Mail Track & Trace meanings

    A few years ago I ordered some expensive golf socks for my son inlaw as a Christmas present. They never came. I took it up with the sender and the post office. After a long drawn out affair - the sender (not ebay - an online shop) sent some more. The post office said they had delivered them and wouldn't budge from that (Nothing signed or card to where they had left it) So he got his socks and all was well in God's heaven and earth. :) 6 months later I went to the garage to get the lawn mower out for the first time that year and I noticed something fall down the back of it. Yep - the original sock box. The temptation is to say nowt.... but i'm an honest man and I do believe in karma so I emailed the seller. They thanked me for my honesty and said I could 'keep em' I was sporting some rather snazzy Pringle golf socks the next time I played. :)
  14. Royal Mail Track & Trace meanings

    Yea stuff like the multi tool goes on CC so i think it's section 75 applies which means it will stay on my statement for a month or so then be wiped, no intrest for me and the small stuff gos via paypal so i'll get it back in the end but just a faff, it happens every year something to do with all the temp posties just throwing mail in hallway which is open to anyone, it must cost the RM a fortune in compo All1
  15. Royal Mail Track & Trace meanings

    So will you get your money back bud or have you just lost out altogether ?
  16. Royal Mail Track & Trace meanings

    Well as per usual at this time of year mail has gone walkabout, £180 Leatherman Charge TTi multi tool, £30 Wera Kraftform Precision Micro Screwdriver Set and a few other bits and bobs all told about £300 gone missing, wanted to put CCTV in to stop this kind of crap but landlord said no anyway while looking into a tracking number i came up with a message i had not seen before so hunted down a royal mail forum and someone posted this handy link with all the info you should need, hopefully it will help others. https://business.help.royalmail.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/756 All1
  17. Anyone want to earn a few extra ££

    Thanks for the termanology help. What bugs me most was i used to work at a place that had them hanging around everywhere and could have lifted a good few if i had thought about it, the one you mention i can get for £105 new and second hand for £80, so given there is not much difference price wise i'd just buy new if i have to, but the Scottish in me always wants a deal from somewhere. All1
  18. Anyone want to earn a few extra ££

    The term is 'auto-ranging' That means when you put the probes on live terminals, it will sense whether it's AC or DC and what voltage, usually up to 500V Unfortunately - Fluke and cheap are words that don't go together. This is the one I use on a daily basis. It's hand held and you can clip one lead on to the meter to test wherever you want - unlike the one you have shown where you have to put the meter down somewhere to test. https://www.screwfix.com/p/fluke-t5-1000-open-jaw-electrical-tester-1000v/93086
  19. I'm in the market for a cheap (ish) fluke multimeter? The prices they go for on fleabay are a joke, it does not hve to be new in fact i'm hapopy with second hand, maybe a spare one at work is kicking around..... I have no need for manual or box or even leads, it's just i'm trying to learn a wee bit more about electrics and having a cheap MM is just not going to cut it. Given i don't know the right termanology please bear with me, my cheapo MM has, hell uploaded pic to stop any misunderstanding, so this is what i have and i want one where you just swith to volts and it will give a reading be that 1.5 or 240v no messting about with switching dials etc, so anyone help with right termanology for what i'm after or even better a MM? All1
  20. Programming for beginners?

    Awesome! Thanks PH
  21. Upgraded to the latest forum software and on a new server running PHP 7 so things can only get better as they say :)
  22. Great stuff and I never felt a thing
  23. Hi guys, I have made a request to my hosts to move JamersPad to a new cluster which supports PHP 7. They have advised that we may experience downtime of up to 48 hours. Work will begin later today. You can still contact us on Facebook etc
  24. Programming for beginners?

    Check out Stanford university. Thanks have quite e few online and free courses.
  25. Programming for beginners?

    Hi folks Anyone know of a good program or online service that can teach my son basic programming? He wants to get into game development eventually. Thanks in advance GG
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